Episode 97: Awards Floptacular 2012

As you might expect, the episode begins with a colossal digression into words that sound like other words.

The Oscar Ceremony[]

It was super boring, and worse than last year's.

Not to be confused with The Garbies.

The Movies[]

The Floppies[]

For the first time, Dan, Stuart and Elliott give out their own awards to people and movies from the last year of the Flop House. Elliott called them the Flopcademy Flop Flop Flop Awards. The trophies are in the shape of golden floppie disks.

Actor That Sounds Most Like A Car Part: Cam Gigandet (Dan)

Shredded Like Lettuce Award: Cam Gigandet (Dan)

Josh Hartnett Memorial Award for Most Irritating Squint: Cam Gigandet (Dan)

Best Audience Sympathy Role-Reversal: Green Lantern; For making an audience of nerds have to sympathize with a handsome jock who is about to beat up a brainiac in a wheelchair. (Elliott)

Most Erotic Fully-Clothed Sexual Performance: Nicolas Cage in Drive Angry 3D (Stuart)

Angriest Driving: Nicolas Cage in Drive Angry 3D (Elliott)

Cagiest Cage: Nicolas Cage in Trespass (Dan)

Best Hair: Nicolas Cage in all of them.; The trophy for this one has a hideous wig on it. (Elliott)

Most Believable English Accent In A Totally Terrible Movie: Danny McBride and James Franco in Your Highness

Least Fun I Had Watching A Movie Award: Your Highness (Stuart)

Movie That Was Most Sold On The Presence Of A Butt In It: Your Highness (Elliott)

Golden Sieve Award for Movie I Forgot I Watched: Beastly (Dan); Skyline (Stuart); Skyline (Elliott)

Best Actor: Gary Oldman in Red Riding Hood (Elliott)

Lifetime Achievement Award for Longest Movie Ever Watched For the Flop House: The Happiest Millionaire (Stuart)

Paul Walker Award for Being A Black Hole of Charisma: Alex Pettyfer in I Am Number Four and Beastly (Dan)

~~Best Twists~~ Most Twists: Trespass (Elliott)

Flop House Movie That Had the Least Limits: The Roommate, in a huge upset. (Stuart)

Special Achievement in Hats: The Roommate (Elliott)

The "What If Penny Met A Dinosaur?" Award for Strangest Premise: Gooby (Dan); Awarded earlier at the Flop House Technical Awards, hosted by Amanda Bynes.

Best Commercial for T.G.I. Fridays Disguised As A Movie: Zookeeper (Elliott)

The Cold Shower Award: Sucker Punch; The movie that made even Pervazoid #1 ashamed of thinking dirty thoughts. (Dan)

Best Supporting Actor: Eric Zuckerman in My Soul To Take (Elliott)

Best Picture of the Year: (drumroll); It's...; Tango & Cash!; For the 22nd time in a row, Tango & Cash takes home the big prize! (Elliott)

Letters[]

One Flop House fan in the great city of Minneapolis offers a fifty-seat theater in Minneapolis for the Peaches to hold a live event. Another Flop-fan in Washington, DC, tells the story of how he met his girlfriend by giving her the gift of Flop (specifically, the Conan episode).