Tag[]
- "In this episode we discuss the TLC home makeover show Dream House. That's what this thing's about, right?"
Movie Summary[]
Premise[]
Soon after moving into their seemingly idyllic new home, a family learns of a brutal crime committed against former residents of the dwelling.
Story[]
Publisher Will Atenton quits a lucrative job in New York to relocate his wife, Libby, and their daughters to a quaint town in New England. As they settle into their home, however, the Atentons discover that a woman and her children were murdered there, and the surviving husband is the town's prime suspect. With help from a neighbor who was close to the murdered family, Will pieces together a horrifying chain of events.
Final Judgments[]
- Bad-Bad Movie (Stuart) @30:40
- Bad-Bad Movie (Dan) @31:25
- Bad-Bad Movie (Elliott) @32:20
Episode Highlights[]
Elliott reveals Stuart has an evil twin; Stuuuart. The only man who can replace the real Stu, but has a goatee. @0:45
Starring, oh, who's that? 'Ello, 'Ello, 'Ello, it's me, Daniel Cra-ya-ig. Bob's yer uncle, chimeneysweep, butterybread!
For all that the cast is generally good, this movie is not really good. Stuart suggests more boobs, which I believe is a suggestion Stuart would make for every movie. Also, Dan suggests a new movie to go with Fivehead Goes West, called Fievel Goes Crazy.
And there's a rather long digression that somehow leads to the Cryptkeeper's nonexistent privates. Dan has the LONGEST giggle fit about this. He literally turns into a 8 year old, which literally makes him shit out of luck.
Tangents[]
- Dan having his softcore dreams come true getting a copy of The Bikini Carwash Company. @27:45
- An oddly detailed discussion about Stuart and Dan lending each other porn DVDs and making sure the movie doesn't start up right at the wank scene.
- Elliott losing an eBay auction for a 1939 World's Fair RCA booth card. @29:00
- Baby-lon 8
- Elliott's nickname giving conventions–ie. Branielle, or Gluart (also the name of Elliott's horse)
- Dan's Shoes @27:45
- Fantasizing about Daniel Craig having sex with his wife, Rachel Weisz.
- Movie idea: "Scream Mouse–Fievel Goes Crazy"
- Tijuana Bibles
- Mobsters giving Blondie a good rogering while Dagwood watches.
- Garfield fucking lasagna while Odie chokes. @43:40
- Tintin comics @07:25
- Stuart plans on watching Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance @56:30
Final Judgements[]
- 3 for 3 with Bad-Bad Movie (@30:40)
Movie Pitches[]
- Scream Mouse It's like Scream, but with mice. @30:00
Quotes[]
- “I'm pretty sure you're with me, Dan. This entire movie could have been spiced up with a little bit of nudity. [...] So—shower scenes, beach volleyball that goes wrong and tops come off...”
—Stuart @26:25
- “What the fuck did you say about my mom?”
—Stuart @27:30
Listener Mail[]
- "You Know What You Did (You Made My Night!)" from Firstnamewithheld Maxwell @35:05
- Regarding the live screening of Marmaduke.
- "I Wish All the Movies I Watch Featured Commentary by You Three" from Danny Patrick Lastnamewithheld @37:05
- Regarding the live screening of 12 Rounds.
- "Concerns for Dan's Safety" from Matt Lastnamewithheld @39:50
- Dan is a bear+Stuart's fantasy of killing a bear with a blowtorch=OH MY GOD, STUART WANTS TO KILL DAN! Flamethrowers at dawn, gentlemen.
- Pervazoid #1 @41:50
- Episode 35: Fireproof @41:50
- "Thanks for 2011" from Brian Lastnamewithheld @46:00
Recommendations[]
- The Chaser (2008) by Na Hong-jin (Elliott) @56:10
- The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011) by David Fincher (Dan) @53:05
- Ironclad (2011) by Jonathan English (Stuart) @50:15
- “If you like watching a movie set in the Middle Ages, where a bunch of dudes hit each other in the head with axes and their heads totally explode, and Brian Cox gets both of his hands chopped off before being thrown against a wall with a trebuchet...”
—Stuart
- “If you like watching a movie set in the Middle Ages, where a bunch of dudes hit each other in the head with axes and their heads totally explode, and Brian Cox gets both of his hands chopped off before being thrown against a wall with a trebuchet...”