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"Of all the blockbusters last summer, one entirely failed to bust blocks. We discuss Jonah Hex."

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What the Hex?

Movie Summary[]

Premise[]

The U.S. military makes a scarred bounty hunter with warrants on his own head an offer he cannot refuse: in exchange for his freedom, he must stop a terrorist who is ready to unleash Hell on Earth.

Story[]

Having cheated death, gunslinger and bounty hunter Jonah Hex has one foot in the natural world and one in the supernatural. His unusual nature gives him the ability to track down anyone or anything, so the Army makes him an irresistible offer: It will erase the warrants on his head if he will find Quentin Turnbull. Turnbull, his oldest enemy, is preparing to unleash hell on Earth and will stop at nothing to kill him.

Final Judgments[]

  • Turkey Terrible (Dan) @30:25
  • Spookily Good-Bad (Stuart) @31:00
  • Turkey Terrible (Elliott) @32:00
­It was like they were trying to make the movie bad. I guess they were successful, if that was their aim...
       —Stuart @31:45

Episode Highlights[]

The first Flop House film to feature Stuart's doppelgänger Josh Brolin. Not to be confused with the porn parody "Boner Sex". It is also the first appearance of The Flop House House Cat. Also featured Elliott's "Fantasy Mailbag", because Dan was too sick to print off actual fan letters.

Tangents[]

Movie Pitches[]

Quotes[]

  • ­I think this is the most times I've heard you say 'I hate this fucking movie' during a movie.
           —Elliott, to Stewart @31:30

Media Feud[]

@37:05
Stuart: What about that hate mail from... Pittsburgh, was it?
Elliott: Yeah, that guy in Pittsburgh hates you.
Dan: Look this up, Flop House. The Pittsburgh Post Gazette hates Dan McCoy. This is not a joke.
Elliott: We finally have a media feud, the first Flop House media feud. And you know what? The Pittsburgh Post Gazette can suck it! That's what I say. Let's get this feud rolling.
Stuart: They can eat a bag of dicks.
Elliott: They can eat it real hard, and Pittsburgh is crap.
Dan: More like Pittsburgh Post Ga-sucks! Am I right, guys?
Elliott: We had it and we lost it. Do not give him a cat meow. He does not deserve that.

Listener Mail[]

Mailbag Song[]

@Time

Letters[]

"Mail Title" from Listener Lastnamewithheld @Time
 
"Mail Title" from Listener Lastnamewithheld @Time
 
"Mail Title" from Listener Lastnamewithheld @Time
 

Recommendations[]

  • Black Swan (2010) by Darren Aronofsky (Dan)
  • Head of the Family (1996) by Charles Band (Stuart)
  • Sin Nombre (2009) by Cary Fukunaga (Elliott)
  • Somewhere (2010) by Sofia Coppola (Dan)

Mentioned In[]